Therapy for relationship patterns and boundaries
Why do the same relationship patterns keep repeating?
This is individual therapy, not couples work. The patterns that repeat in how you relate, people-pleasing, difficulty saying no, fear of abandonment or of closeness, usually trace to early beliefs about yourself and others. CBT drawing on attachment and schema work identifies those patterns and builds boundaries and communication that hold. At The Lyceum, Sanah Younis, a BABCP-accredited CBT therapist, delivers this in Chiswick, Ealing and Richmond, or online. Assessment explores recurring relational patterns, beliefs about self and others, practical boundaries and the current context. It does not label a person by an attachment style or offer couples therapy through an individual route. Does this sound familiar? You say yes when you mean no, then feel depleted or resentful. Closeness can trigger fear of abandonment, fear of being controlled or a need to withdraw. The same patterns recur despite knowing you want something different. The signed approach is individual CBT drawing on attachment and schema work. It identifies repeating beliefs and patterns, then develops boundaries and communication that can hold in ordinary life. What could become more possible Clearer boundaries without needing to become distant or harsh. More choice in how closeness, conflict and communication are handled. How we measure progress Where measures are used, they supplement rather than replace a careful individual assessment. This service is individual therapy, not couples work. GAD-7 alongside CORE-OM or IIP-32 if used. The client sits before me, bewildered by a painful pattern that seems to follow them from person to person. I see someone with a deep, unmet need for connection, who acts in ways that unintentionally push it away, either by clinging tightly out of fear, or building walls to prevent hurt. We tenderly map these relational blueprints. We help them see that a healthy boundary isn't a wall built for isolation, but a safe gate that allows genuine, secure love to enter.
Frequently asked questions
Is this couples therapy?
No. This is individual therapy for the patterns, beliefs and boundaries you bring into relationships.
Do I need an attachment label?
No. The work can explore patterns of closeness, distance, reassurance and boundaries without turning them into a fixed label.
What are relationship patterns in therapy?
Relationship patterns can include people-pleasing, difficulty saying no, fear of abandonment, fear of closeness or withdrawing when conflict appears. Individual assessment explores beliefs about self and others, practical boundaries and the current context without fixing a label.
Can therapy help with boundaries?
Individual CBT drawing on attachment and schema work can explore repeating beliefs and patterns, then develop boundaries and communication that can hold in ordinary life. This is individual therapy rather than couples work.
Why do I keep people-pleasing?
People-pleasing is rarely just about wanting to be nice; it is usually rooted in a profound fear of conflict, abandonment, or rejection. You may have learned early on that your safety or worth depended on keeping others happy at your own expense. In therapy, we map these repeating patterns and help you develop secure boundaries, teaching you that you can be compassionate and communicate clearly without constantly abandoning yourself.
Do I need an attachment style label?
No. The work can explore patterns of closeness, distance, reassurance and self-protection without turning them into a fixed attachment label. The focus is on the impact of the pattern and what could become more workable.